Apr 01 2014, 06:00 AM by Hal Licino
April Fool’s has become not only an online tradition but a way for brand marketers to derive some wildly viral results if you know exactly what buttons to push on the first day of April. If you’re successful in pulling the April wool over Fool-ish eyes you’ll soon have millions of people all over the world getting “got” with your wily brand message. We can all learn some valuable lessons on how to craft an April Fool’s ploy that will resonate across the net through some a quick review of the 15 most monumental gotchas!
- Google Nose. The latest advance in search engine technology is this new feature that “temporarily aligns molecules to emulate a particular scent” so that you can now search for skunk or durian or Chanel Number Five and get the full olfactory experience.
- Twitter consonants. Effective immediately Twitter will charge users $5 per month to have access to vowels or they can use the standard free service Twttr whr twts cn b snt lk ths.
- YouTube shutdown. Now that YouTube has become the standard of the online video industry the company is finally ready to choose the winner of the Best Internet Video Contest and shut itself down.
- Kayak dating. When you search for a flight to your favorite destination you can now choose the age, location, and sexual preference of a possible date in that city.
- It’s now Vimeow. In a prototypical example of knowing exactly how and where your bread is buttered, video sharing site Vimeo will now be known as Vimeow since it’s become a cat video site anyway.
- Seamless & hot. If the sight of the oily zits and missing teeth on your pizza delivery person are putting you off your dinner, Seamless now offers a Deluxe Delivery service which allows you to upgrade to a more attractive delivery man or woman.
- Skype String. Videoconferencing has become so darn complicated that Skype has now introduced a version for its more technologically challenged users: Two cups and a string with a minimum bandwidth of 5 mm.
- The ultimate 3D printer. Kodak has discovered a way to truly harness the best of 3D printing technology by launching a national network of print kiosks which will print your choice of live, adorable, fluffy kittens.
- Volcano Virgin. Sir Richard Branson’s company can already take you into the skies and even into outer space, so it’s now launching a journey into the molten lava core of an erupting volcano!
- Mail Order Nuclear. Tiger Direct is now offering the Kube X-15 among its hard drives and flatscreens which is a nuclear generator which can power a city for 50 years, and it even includes a tube of plutonium.
- Bieber Or Die. Funny Or Die has just been sold to Justin and will now feature nothing but videos such as “Dramatic Bieber” and “Bieber After The Dentist.”
- Really LinkedIn. In the “People You May Know” list some of the contact recommendations include Albert Einstein, Groucho Marx, Robin Hood, and Sherlock Holmes.
- Starbucks Anywhere. With its new Mobile Pour app, any Starbucks customer anywhere can order their favorite beverage which will be immediately be dispatched to their location by a barista riding a scooter.
- Whole Foods Set. Whole Foods markets will now feature a chamber orchestra playing classics on fruits and vegetables, a section of fully organic food insects raised with compassion, a trio of Camembert, Vieux-Boulogne, and Roquefort lip balms, and a new way to have your entire paycheck automatically converted to a Whole Foods gift card.
- Bacon Scope. It’s been a breakfast staple for centuries, so why not ditch that icky minty flavor and go with what you really crave in the morning? Bacon flavored Scope! Yum!
April Fool’s jokes to the general populace are not an online invention as the best predated the invention of ARPANET. Way back in 1957, the BBC TV program Panorama showed the Swiss harvesting spaghetti from trees, which triggered a large number of phone calls to the Beeb asking where they could find spaghetti tree seedlings!
Posted in Entertainment