Warning: Spoiler alerts ahead. Her was one of my favorite movies this year. If not my very favorite, it was at least top three. It was a great story, well acted and a very fine example of filmmaking. Spike Jonze is a great storyteller, who knows how to captivate an audience. As much as I enjoyed the movie, I couldn’t help but think about how some of the themes of the movie tied into my job as a social networking manager. That’s why I wrote the Benchmark 5: Social Media Lessons from Her.

1.Sometimes, lonely people just want someone to talk to. Joaquin Phoenix’s Theodore was reeling from a divorce. He gravitated towards his OS, because it was there to keep him company (as did his video games). A lot of times, people just want to feel heard. They may complain or vent on social media, but an honest apology is all it takes to turn their frown upside down. Or let them know you enjoyed something they wrote or shared and you may have a loyal social follower for life!

2.Human connection is important. There’s no substitute for face to face interaction. You can do social media, and well, but in-person communication can leave a far longer lasting impact. Go out and meet people. Trade shows, in your brick-and-mortar establishment or anywhere else. Make an impression in person. Stay top of mind with social media.

3.Integrate seamlessly. In Her, you see everyone going about their everyday business, completely engrossed in conversation with their OS. It became the new normal. Do your social media marketing so well, people don’t even realize they’re being marketed to. If they can forget that fact, your messages are going to be more powerful and better received.

4.Show, don’t tell. In the movie, that meant very subtle things going on in the background. With each scene in public, more and more people are talking to their OS, and not other people. The movie never addresses it directly, but allows it to evolve naturally. The fashion and architecture is just different enough to let you know it’s a not-too-distant future. Let images speak for you. In social media, that can mean using graphics to tell the message, rather than 140 characters or less.

5.It’s not always the more, the merrier. Seriously, biggest spoiler yet is coming right about here. In the movie, Theodore realizes that his OS isn’t only talking to him. There’s others. Many others. It was a deal breaker for him. Sometimes, it feels like social media is a race to have the most followers. In fact, you may be better off with fewer, more engaged followers. Personalization goes a long way in marketing.